• customer: can I ask you something I have no business asking you
  • me: and your total is $56.83, if I could get a signature right here
  • customer: why do you wear that ring in your nose, you're an attractive boy
  • me: and here's your receipt
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    almightykushlord:

    Dakarai Molokomme, a 15-year-old starving child from a small village in Zimbabwe, has just told , one of the most famous pop stars in the world, to  and f*** , the local media are reporting exclusively.

    “Yes, it’s true, I told Madonna to go f*** herself. Do you want to know why?” Dakarai asked. “It’s the same thing every time with these snobby rich Americans. Every once in a while they come to show us their support for the so-called eradication of poverty by adopting a child from a starving family, but they actually do more harm than good. Transracial international adoptions are part of the white savior industrial complex,” Dakarai explained.

    In further discussions with journalists from the media, the  stated that “none of the children here actually want to be taken away from their family and friends so they can be displayed as some kind of trophy in the homes of self-righteous singers or actors who want to score some points with the media and Oprah.”

    “If they really want to help us, they should get Big Pharma to ship us some anti-retroviral drugs for the AIDS epidemic, or build schools and hospitals. If they don’t want to do that, then they can all go f** themselves!” the child told reporters.

    The 15-year-old also stated that he would say the same thing to any one of those American or European “faux humanitarian posers”, except for Bono, whom he said he would also kick in the groin.

    “Bono’s efforts to save the African savage from itself prove that the colonial imperative is alive and well,” Dakarai said as he walked with other village children collecting sticks to build a tree fort.

    THIS IS THE RAWEST 15 YEAR OLD ALIVE

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    luaren:

    Honestly can’t wait for the 50 shades movie to normalize the manipulation of lower-level female employees. Can’t wait for the new wave of “consent is sexy” banners on the cover of cosmo. Can’t wait for teen girls to think that a controlling relationship is romantic. Can’t wait for sexualized violence to become increasingly mainstream. And most of all, I can’t wait for BDSM to be labeled a feminist revolution.

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    james-brown-is-dead:

    "I thought I loved you, it was just how you looked in the light."

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